So I'm using a draft of a previous blog cause I realized, I didn't say anything about Memorial Day. I posted some pics, but didn't actually write about my experience. We went over the weekend and it was soo much fun. I always look forward to my trips up there to see my dad's side of the family. They are soo sweet, and always soo kind and accepting. I really do love them with all my heart. Although we did the typical deal of visiting the different gravesites and then having lunch at the BurgerMiester in Midway. Except its not BurgerMeister anymore! But the food was still amazing and we were in very good company.
I didn't really realize the importance of Memorial Day previous to this year, always thought it was a good time to see my Dad's side of the family and pay respects and so on. Well, it wasn't until we were at the Heber Cemetery and this sweet man thats there every year started playing Amazing Grace on the bagpipes.
All I could think about was all the regret of not burying Grayson and having a place to go pay my respects and I had to walk away from the group so I could compose myself. I have to find some way to save some money so I can get a plot and headstone, even though it will be empty, at least I will have a place to remember him. And maybe as ideas are flowing I can create a place for others to visit who were in my situation and couldn't afford to have a funeral for their little one or made what they felt a wrong decision in a tough time like me. Its going to be a long journey. But I've got to do something to give Grayson the respect he deserves, in his short life he taught me a lot, he needs somewhere to be remembered. So back to Memorial Day, this one is definitely one I'm going to remember, not because there was anything bigger than normal that happened, but because it was the first one that had real true meaning to me.