Thursday, December 30, 2010
Nate also got a hampster named Bob for his christmas/birthday and is so very excited about him. He takes such good care of him and we all love him. Every night we have to say good night and incorporate him into our bedtime routine.
Anyway...still haven't figured out how to get pictures from my phone to my computer. I'll post pictures when I do.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
-Put a couple dollars away every paycheck and truly start saving
-My dang eating healthier goal (I was doing good then got hindered by the holidays. Starting fresh now)
-Getting set right with my life
-Becoming more involved (not is a psycho way) with whats going on in my family
-Learning the concepts of the movie Eat Pray Love (I need to learn pretty much everything she learned on her trek I'm just not sure how. I'm sure it will come with these other goals and time)
- Get this dang divorce stuff finally handled and kids protected
Monday, December 27, 2010
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
-Blessed to be able to afford to live. Although its tight, and its not fantastically awesome to be poor...I do have enough to cover my bills and I'm grateful for that.
-Blessed to have a nice roof over my head. Its nice not having to watch the boys stomp and smash cockroaches...even if it does come with a higher rent tag.
-Blessed to have a car. Which I'm tryin to see the positives with right now since I'm pretty much just praying it lasts until taxes come back so I can buy a new one. Its a race against the clock. But at least I have a way of getting around.
-Blessed that I have a plan in place for me. I may not know what it is...but every time I start to doubt it I get a swift kick in the butt telling me just to have faith and things will work out. Also a swift kick saying to take care of business so it can work out. But all the same...I know he's there and loves me.
Monday, December 20, 2010
So I'm listening to Christmas music in hopes of a more Christmasy attitude and Breath of Heaven by Amy Grant has come on. The words are getting to me today which is funny because I don't know how many times I've sang that song and haven't thought twice. But these words are striking the heart...
Friday, December 17, 2010
Thursday, December 16, 2010
which makes me laugh cause he doesn't even like cotton candy. He then tried his best negotiation tactics and told me he would look at the candy bar selection up front while we were waiting to check out and that if he didn't want anything he would run back and get cotton candy. Images of candy crashing and shelves falling over came to my head. So once again had to kibosh his dream of wandering a big store alone and climbing 10 ft up the shelves to get cotton candy that was on the highest hook.
He told me he was okay with just choosing something from the front and as soon as we got there...he took a short 100000th of a second glance and decided on cotton candy. Too late. We were in line and people behind us. So then came the tantrum.
"But I WANT the cotton candy. I DON'T want anything there." I said too bad choose something here or get nothing at all...and unloaded my groceries. He throws more of a fit. I say more too bad. Finally the cashier is waiting and I tell him choose something now or forever hold your peace. Well....I almost had to drag a teary-eyed boy out the store because life was just not fair! And momma is mean! And he wanted cotton candy! Not stupid gum that he chose!
Oh well. It is what it is. Life went on. He got his gum. And after cleaning not another word was even mentioned about the cotton candy.
Yay I love being a momma sometimes. :)
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
-My brother is amazing. He has taught me alot about his character and about things I need to start doing in my own life before a tragedy occurs to knock some sense into me. Its been an eye opening experience for sure. He's handled things soo differently than I probably would've and it makes me want to do better.
-My family. I say it often but I couldn't ask for a better family. I really couldn't. To see everyone so supportive of each other has been amazing. Prayers and miracles are flying everywhere and I if there was ever a time that I doubted the power of prayer that has been completely abolished. They do get answered and miracles do happen.
-My work and clients. The amount of support I and my family have recieved from them has been amazing. I am soo grateful to work in such a supportive place and to work with such great people. I truly feel blessed.
-My ward. I know. I used to really not like going and would dodge out. But with this new bishopric things have changed immensely. They have opened their arms to me and made me feel welcome, something I haven't had since I moved there.
-My kids. I have realized that as much as I love my kids I haven't been making them a priority, and that is going to change. There are some big things that are going to be put in play to protect them and make sure that their interests are met and not just the selfish interests of the other party involved. No more being a pushover. It's time to stretch out the claws. Phew this is going to be a hard experience but it needs to be done.
I have no idea if anyone even pays attention to these posts but I've heard that more people than I realize follow what goes on with my little family. So I thank you all for the kindness and support I've been given through my ups and downs and am grateful to you all too.
Have a great day!
Monday, December 13, 2010
Then I came home to the family issues going on and that has taken a little bit of time to sink in. But I just want both parties involved to know that I love you both. I'm not one to take sides and I will love and support both of you and your family and do what I can to make this whole transitition process alot easier. There have been several miracles and blessings answered this weekend personally and for the family and I attribute it to this experience so as hard as it is for everyone, we are all being blessed for it as well.
Friday, December 3, 2010
Second blessing from them...she asked me if it would be okay for her to submit my name to her church for a Christmas basket. She said she didn't by any means want me to think she assumed I was too poor for Christmas or anything, but she knows I'm a single mom and am trying to make it on my own and really wanted to help. And since our daycare is in the church, the congretation really loves those little kids and really try to intertwine themselves when they can. I wanted to cry. This is such a blessing and will help out immensely considering we are tight on money right now.
I never really realize how much people care and how much people truly think about us and our situation. I feel very blessed and appreciative...and hope I can give back somehow as well.
On a different note, since today is Friday and I will be gone all next week I do not know if I will be posting. I may...but if not...I hope everyone has a great week next week and I'll talk to you all soon!
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Monday, November 29, 2010
Be grateful for things that you have instead of focusing on things that you don't have. Which we all know is standard, but instead of saying "Oh I hate doing laundry it never seems to get all the way done" Say instead "I am soo grateful to have these clothes to clean, because it means that I am surrounded by people who love me and care about me" or instead of "I hate exercising, its such a pain" try saying "I am grateful to have a body that allows me to move and function, and I'm grateful I have the ability to keep it strong!"
In the teachers case, she had been struggling with her husband constantly being gone due to work. She had been particularly mad about it one day when she visited some family. Her grandmother had lost her grandfather 8 years ago and it was an eye opener to her because even though her husband is gone alot, she can still call him or text him and know that he will be home soon. In her grandmothers case, she has no way to physically contact him. That experience humbled her quite a bit.
So I'm going to try it. When negative thoughts creep in my mind, I'm going to turn it around and make it positive and see what kinda happy spot I can move into.
Except for this year.
This Thanksgiving was soo peaceful. Me and Ryder hung out with Carol, one of the tenants at work, for a while in the morning then met up with Mom and Dad, and a family from the ward at The Garden House. That food was DELICIOUS! It was just a really nice experience and one that I hope to repeat in the future. Afterwards, me and Ry went back to work and hung out with the tenants at their Thanksgiving Dinner. It was really a good time, very comfortable and peaceful.
The whole weekend really ended up being great. Betsy helped me order my first Christmas Cards ever...and I got alot of cleaning done.
So I learned my lesson...Thanksgiving is just about being thankful for all that you have, not just the gathering of family or lots of food.
Thursday, November 25, 2010
I'm rather excited about these....my boys are not little boys anymore! They are turning into handsome young men! I'm not thrilled about me looking kinda retarded in the family picture but it all good hah! Thanks to Abbey Kyhl at www.abbeykyhl.com who took them...she did a fantastic job!
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Since Thanksgiving is tomorrow...I figured I'd better dedicate a blog to it. This year's Thanksgiving is going to be a bit scattered with the family splitting up to in-laws houses and such and the boys are going with their dad. The tenants at work invited me to their dinner so me and Ry are headed there then off to eat out with my parents after. Should be a fairly good day I think.
So on with the show.
I am thankful for my family. I know I say it alot, but I feel soo blessed to have such a great family. We are supportive and loving of each other and I know any one of thems got my back. And I got theirs too. Its soo nice to know theres a safe spot to fall if needed, a listening ear, good advice givers, all that jazz. I love you all.
I am also thankful for my boys. They are such a blessing. Some days are better than others and some days I wonder what it would be like to have my life go in a different direction. But when it comes down to it, I like my life. Yes I've had trials and such but they have made me such a stronger person and I truly wouldn't be who I am today if it weren't for the opposition I've faced.
I am thankful for my job. In this economy I'm grateful to have a job...but even more grateful to have a job I love. I look forward to coming to work everyday which is not something many people can say these days. It's hard when I have to give reality checks to people but its worth it to be able to help those truly in need.
So Happy Thanksgiving to all and I hope ya'll have a great Thanksgiving day!
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
*Dallas was good. I learned a LOT of awesome things that I'm bringing back and revamping my program with to make it alot better.
-While in Dallas, I was actually not the normal out and about girl I am at trainings, but the new counselor A and I went out to the Galleria Mall one of the nights and it was a blast! There was a dude dressed like Santa waving cars in and in the mall there was a ginormous 4 story tree. Under it was the ice skating rink and it was amazing to see! It made me more excited for Christmas. While at the mall, A introduced me to Sephora. Wow I love that store. And then we got introduced to some guy at Macys doing free makeup "makeovers" when I got done I kind of looked like a cartoon character...and my eye brows...well...Ryder could have done a better job filling them in. So we headed back to Sephora and I re-applied my face again. After that we browsed some little shops and ate at a cute little french bistro type place.
-The place we were staying (The Fairmont Inn) was only about a quarter mile away from the Grassy Knoll where JFK was shot, and the book repositorium (sp?) which was kind of an awe moment to think that we drove down the street where he was shot and was soo close to that place. I'm not a history buff by any means, but it was kind of cool to see.
-Also, while in Dallas, I missed my kids insanely. The other trainings I've missed them but haven't focused on it too much. This trip...I was really wishing they were there. Didn't help that seeing all these cool things made me want to show the boys.
*I'm really starting to look forward to the DC trip. Yet another trip I really wished I could take the boys to, because there are soooo many things there they would love. We've been talking about it in the office though and there are soo many cool places we are planning on visiting. Its going to be a long, fun, but sad (cause I'll miss the boys) week.
*I am soo excited for Christmas to be coming. I cannot wait. And this year I get the boys for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. I got a bit irritated at D and his ridiculous behavior so....I told him straight up this is when I'm taking them so too bad if you had other plans. So that makes me happy.
Anyway...I think thats all for now. I hope everyone is doing well and hope ya'll have a good rest of the week!
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Yes I do. I'll be back Friday. Hehe.
Today I leave for Dallas. I'm excited to go to this training because I will be attending a loss mitigation negotiation class...where I will learn how to negotiate better. This is a trait I do not possess at the moment. So big bad Lenders...after this training...here I come! Watch out for the soon to be queen of negotiation! I hope. So anyway...in good ol' Dallas style....ya'll have a good day now! :)
Monday, November 15, 2010
Now its off to work for me...have a great day all!
Friday, November 12, 2010
And yes...I'm thinking about Christmas early this year. We already have our tree up and everything. But this is mostly because I am going to be gone next week and gone the first week of December. Figured we'd start early. :)
Have a good weekend everyone!!
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Monday, November 8, 2010
Friday, November 5, 2010
So thank you to the Large family of Canada...you are a great example and definitely have humbled my heart!
Thursday, November 4, 2010
1. I'm happy that I have such loving parents. I wouldn't make it in this 'lil world of mine without them.
2. I'm happy I have a job, and one that pays pretty good.
3. I'm happy that I have good co-workers who support me and are there for me for even the littlest things.
4. I'm happy I have 3 awesome little boys, even though they have been a bit mischevious the last week.
5. I'm happy for my great clients who are always willing to do what I need to help them progress.
6. I'm happy for the church, it gives me a sense of comfort when I need it most.
7. I'm happy my kids have such great teachers in school, and go to such a good daycare.
So thats it for the day. Hopefully the day will improve and things will get back to normal soon.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
So today is not going to be day 1 like I thought, but its going to be my prep day for day 1 tomorrow. Mostly because I was going to start getting some food ready for today last night...but fell asleep really early. (Although I am still eating healthy today... just not all the recommended foods)
So today...my friends...is a new day.
What I'm planning on starting tomorrow is the 6 Week Body Makeover by Michael Thurmond. It is a great program thats not really a diet. Thats what I love about it. So a run down of the program. Because I am a Type A body (I took a cool little quiz to figure that out) I will be needing to eat more lean meats like chicken, turkey, fish, etc and lots of veggies. Lots of fruit as well, but the ones with less sugar like grapefruit, berries, etc. And I got to eat 3 meals a day with 2 or 3 snacks as well, just in better portions. So I'm gonna be eating like a mad man which will be a new experience for me since I usually don't eat all day then chow when I get home.
(its blurry...and not me...sorry...but this is what ya do)
Then after blueprinting my body, I designed a workout plan to work the parts of my body that I want to trim down. Its a really cool process all in all. I kind of had fun blueprinting my body and deciding what I want to change. The workouts consist of muscle training (done with tension bands) and cardio (which can be as easy as taking a walk). All are easy exercises to do so I know I won't flake out and give up.
And maybe...I'll be a success story like this lady. Although I don't have 385 lbs to lose thankfully...but its a bit inspiring to see someone with so much fat to lose, actually lose it. I don't have excuses anymore. So here we go. On to a new journey for me. And I'm kinda excited about it. :)
Monday, November 1, 2010
Anyway...the boys looked awesome so did the rest of the family! I can't wait to get the actual pictures back so we can get holiday cards done maybe this year. I'll post as soon as we do get them done.
Friday, October 29, 2010
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
I am feeling more at peace with my decision to not take the home. It is still very bittersweet, especially when the people who are most likely going to be taking the house instead of me came in yesterday. So I'm still a bit sad...but its the best decision.
I'm grateful for my family. Everyone has been soo supportive of me and the boys. I am very grateful to have a family who cares about each other and will do anything they can to love and support each other. I'm truly blessed.
I'm overloaded at work. I'm happy that our new counselor started this week because its going to be really good to have some help. And she seems really nice and willing to help out with anything we need, so I'm happy shes here and I think it will work out well.
My trips to Dallas and Washington DC are coming up pretty quick, and I'm rather excited to go traveling again. I enjoy my trainings and the extra per diem money is going to help out quite a bit right now.
I'm starting my 6 week body makeover plan next week and am rather excited about it. A friend of mine started last week and has already lost 13 pounds just by eating foods that speed up her metabolism. She hasn't even started working out as much as the plan advises. I'm hoping I'll have good success with it as well. My only issue with it will be eating as much as the plan calls for. I'm horrible at eating while at work. So we shall see how it goes. But I love this diet because you eat 6 meals a day (little ones of course) and exercise of course. No diet pills, no quick loss promises, just healthy food and exercise. I was on it when I got married and lost about 20 pounds, but quit doing it. So I know it works...just need to stick with it.
Hopefully today is a better day and things buck up a little bit. I'm still in the downish phase from the house...but it will all work out. This just wasn't the time I suppose. Hopefully better things are coming soon. Anyway...Have a good day ya'll!
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
This one is really dark...but after the corn mazes we played on some giant hay bales until the tractor came back to pick us up
Monday, October 25, 2010
-I would have my OWN home
-I'm still renting
Friday, October 22, 2010
Now I realize I signed a legal document (the lease) and that I should be accountable for that. I guessed I would've hoped that they would appreciate the fact that I'm improving my living situation (they are a real estate company too....geez!) not to mention the fact that here at the office we have been very nice to them, we have worked with them, heck we didn't take legal action (which we very well could've) for some things that happened between them and us.
I don't know....I guess I shouldn't expect them to break a lease. As mom puts it...what makes me feel entitled to have them break a lease? I just have never had anything like this happen before. Most landlords are flexible and will work with people. I've yet to deal with a landlord that has not been. I guess there is a first time to everything.
Soo....its time for some decisions I guess. We will see what happens.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
The reason I bring this person up is because it got me thinking about my own boys. I have really tried to instill the gentleman thing in them and they have good examples all around them constantly. But they also have bad examples around them alot and I just hope the good outweighs the bad. They are pretty polite I think...usually they use please and thank you and excuse me and they are usually fairly helpful. They have also recently been standing up for their beliefs. This horrid neighbor girl goes to the play park and swears up a storm, using words a sailor would blush hearing. For the last 3 days when she is out there, the boys tell her to stop saying those words and when she doesn't they come inside instead of playing. That makes me one proud momma right there.
So anyway, I just want to make a shout out to my friend and all those other gents out there who really strive to be respectful and gentlemanly. You are awesome examples to my kids and are truly gems in this rough and tumble world. Sweet people like that are few and far between unfortunately but I'm happy to know that there are still a couple good guys in the world today. :)
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Monday, October 18, 2010
1. Ryder is starting to copy EVERYTHNG that EVERYONE says. Its kinda cute...except when he picks up naughty stuff. Like him and his brothers downstairs this morning singing "stupid stupid stupid" But he also says cute stuff, like delissshhhhus (delicious) and when we are reading books he likes to point to characters and say "whas dat guy?" And if I get it wrong...he says "Nooooo its ____". But he does it with every character on every page. Sometimes...we have like ten "whas dat guy? and dat guy? and dat guy?"
2. Tyler makes me laugh a bit. This morning he put on a pair of Ryders pants (that fit him actually) and said "How do I look momma?" I had to tell him to change considering they were capris and I didn't think that would go over well at school. So he comes back with "But they are MY size...they said like 5T. Thats my size. Not Ryders size" (they are 2T....yeah).
3. Nate is rather excited to move. He was the corporal of the packing team this morning or something... they decided to start packing our food. After I told them the food is the last thing we pack. And as I come downstairs he says "I told Tyler not to...I told him we had to do something else first (as he has 2 cans of spaghettios in his hand ready to put them in the box).
These are probably not humorous to anyone but me....but I sure think its funny and they make me smile. :)
Friday, October 15, 2010
Although stress will come first of course. Working on our quarterly billing towards are grants...and I messed up the grant previously so I'm extra nervous this time because I'm at the emotional breaking point right now and I really am tired of messing stuff up. This is the only job I've ever had where I mess up on things. I don't know if its me...how I'm trained...I don't know. Its frustrating though and leaves me second guessing everything I do.
So here is to Friday...you will bring me loads of stress today my dear Friday, but hopefully you will end with relaxation and peace.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Firstly, I'm kind of lazy. Which brings me to my next point that for some reason when I'm getting ready to move...I let my house cleaning go a little. I don't know why I do this...but for some reason I do. Which is actually harder for me in the end because I have to clean doubly as much later on. But I am actually looking forward to packing...I just need to find some boxes first. My soon to be new neighbor is gonna try to hook me up with those. Thats good.
Secondly, I'm rather excited for payday tomorrow. And thats humorous considering I'm not gonna have very much spare money left after paying bills and paying for some of this moving stuff. But I will have enough for a $0.99 chicken nugget from Wendys which I have been craving for like 2 weeks but haven't really had the money to get plus I've really been trying to not eat out as often. Been doing pretty good too. Instead we just eat unhealthy food at home :)
Thirdly, my kids rock. They are sweet, hilarious and mischievious boys who make me smile alot. This time it was Tyler who has made me smile this week. When we drive past the cemetery (which is like 3 or 4 times a day in our commuting) he always asks "Mom don't you wish we had a grave for Grayson?" I say yeah and he says "Yeah me too. One of these days right?" He is such a sweetheart. Granted after that him and Ryder are screaming at each other or he's kicking Nates seat to annoy him.
Lastly, I love the show Raising Hope. I watched it for the first time on Tuesday and its crazy funny! I really kind of hope I'm not like the mom on that show...seriously crazy but not aware of my craziness. But it was also kind of insightful. The mom was going crazy over family pictures making them dress up in really funky themes (like 50s poodle skirts and skiers in the middle of Cali) to try and make them look like the perfect happy family. But their best picture through all the years was taken by a traffic violation camera, and it was the best family picture because it had caught them all in a happy spot. No stress or anything, just singing "Whack-a-doo" with each other in their old beat up truck. Reminds me that I need to quit stressing about being "perfect" and just enjoy the time I got with my family :)
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
So its been a....thought provoking....week for me. We have a different mix of girls here at work religionwise. One is a Catholic, one got married in the temple but her and her husband feel like the church is a cult, one is inactive and then there is me. We have been having different converstations about religion here (which I know is bad since we are at work...but we don't have the wierd religious/political craziness thank goodness). They had brought up alot of different things that made me question my religious choice a little bit. Like if we are all sealed together...then how are we to have different "mansions" and such considering I'm sealed to my parents...and if the boys get sealed to me then get married and are sealed to their own families...how does that work? And why is it that only "good" mormons get to live in the highest kingdom when there are some truly amazing people out there of different religions? And although actual stuff that happened in the temple was not discussed out of respect, the one who had gone through said that was their deciding factor to stop practicing the religion. She felt extremely uncomfortable and that sealed the deal for her. So all this talk made me start questioning things because it was kind of ringing true.
All weekend I had thought about it and I decided to go to my parents ward instead of my own which was probably smart. I went in to church thinking why is this the true church? How can this be the true church?
The funniest thing happened imagine that.
As I was sitting through church listening to the testimonies and thinking about these questions of mine and I'll admit..being a tad bitter....and the same answer just crept into my head over and over. "Its all going to be taken care of. Your not meant to know some of these answers yet. Trust that it is all taken care of." And all my hostile feelings just kind of disappeared. I felt at peace. I still had my questions...but it was more for clarification now than for proving my point.
Alot of my discomfort was about going to the temple and what happened there. Fear of the unknown I guess you could say. So it was rather humorous to me that when I got home, a temple preperation handbook was sitting on my living room floor. Not sure where I got it or where it was hiding, but it turned up right there. So I read it. Later that night I called mom and asked my questions. She helped clarify some things and made me feel at peace. She took away my concern about going to the temple and helped me to realize some things about myself too.
I think I can honestly say that I am now finally ready to start my journey. I'd felt it was time previous to the work conversation but that had thrown a wrench in my feelings as had some other personal issues. But I feel like the adversary is trying to really work hard on me for some reason and I think he knew I was ready to start my progression...and really didn't want me to. So I'm feeling good about the decision now. When I get settled into my Enoch ward, me and the bishop are going to have a chat. I really hope and pray that he is a good man who is understanding and loving.
I am scared however. I have alot of fear about this whole deal...but also a huge sense of peace and that peace is finally outweighing the fear. I truly feel like its something I need to do in order to progress and I want to be a good example to my boys.
So here I go.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
I've experienced this first hand with my clients.
And its sad.
Unfair to all those who spent almost a year (and in a lot of cases more time than that) out of their lives doing their due dilligence to the Lender only to have them come back at the last minute (literally in most cases) and say whoops...sorry you don't qualify. Your house is being set on the auction block in a couple hours. So it wasn't too big of a shocker when this came to be.
As positive as this move seems to be...its also rather scary. Yes it gives us a little more time to process modifications and such (which I have a feeling will be delayed anyway cause of this all) but....they are not halting the foreclosure process. Just the auction sales. Which means more and more houses are nearing the end of the foreclosure period and when the moratorum is up...there will be thousands upon thousands of houses that are due to be sold. And my bet is...they will be. I'm guessing its going to be a mass posting of auction notices and no postponements. And its sad. I'm just hoping that this move will benefit my clients as well as anyone else trying to get assistance before everything blows up.
So I'm happy that someone is finally stepping in and saying hey...your screwing up and need to fix the problem now. I'm very grateful for that because the issue did need to be addressed and honestly, I don't know how else they would've addressed it. I would've rathered them put the entire foreclosure process on hold... but I know that would've been too hard.
I don't however look forward to whats going to happen after this is all said and done.
What a sad time we are living in. Very sad.
Monday, October 11, 2010
This is a picture of the ribbon cutting. Holding the ribbon is Steve somethin from Enoch I think and H. Kelly from Utah Housing Corp is bolding the bow. Ashley (my new neighbor) was top pic and got to cut the ribbon. The guy in the blue shirt is Mr Peacock from American Express (the investor for the homes) then me, then Heidi another tenant, then Justin from SMJ Construction was behind me. This is the model of home I had my heart set on...but didn't get. BUT...I'm happy with what I got...its growing on me :)
Friday, October 8, 2010
The master bath and closet
The entry way