Wednesday, January 11, 2012

More of a vent post than anything

via google images
As mentioned in the title, I'm venting. And its not something I try to do on here (ok I do more than I wish I did) but I feel better after I write stuff down so here goes.
I am having to be around a person who is incredibly bi-polar I think. One minute this person is happy and helpful and has your back (or at least they want you to think that) and the next you are lower than dirt and can't do anything right. Its frustrating. I know that this person has control issues and I keep getting told that this person is intimidated by me possibly (I'm still not sure about that one) which could explain why this person is not very nice. But it's frustrating. Truly frustrating. I have been working my tail off to help this person and it's all for nothing. Everything I do gets re-done. Things I get asked to do are given to others to do (even though I have already completed them) and its extremely frustrating to me to work so hard with nothing in return. Not to mention it gets to a point where they completely push me out of whats going on and then blames me for not getting things done. It makes me want to throw in the towel and be done with them. And then things get less stressful and everything is back to normal. And then something else comes up and its a vicious cycle where it all starts over again. What is worse is when this person is having a bad/stressful day, they will make sure everyone else knows how horrible and awful I am and it causes for an extremely awkward situation.
It's sad really. I've learned to let most stuff slide off my shoulder and not let it bother me. But it's the days that this person takes a personal hit against me that I struggle. And that was exactly what happened most recently and has prompted this post. As I'm writing this though it has opened my eyes to some things. This person is charismatc but not in the good way. As I'm thinking back on other situations that I've observed with other people, this person is very nice to people and then talks badly about them behind their back. Which is something I've experienced as well. And I think in order to gain "control" over things this person needs to feel superior to others. Which makes complete sense given their behavior. is a new day. I'm going to really try not to let things bother me and just be the best person I can be. I know I'm a good person and I know that I'm trying my best to make choices that are right. I just need to keep that in mind and know that Heavenly Father sees the bigger picture and I'm not given challenges that I can't face head on. It will make me stronger.

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